I Went on Three Dates and Now I Understand the Male Loneliness Epidemic

Local Woman Conducts Field Research, Confirms Widespread Shortage of Follow-Up Questions

NEW YORK, N.Y. — What began as a casual return to the dating scene quickly escalated into what one woman now describes as “a fully immersive case study” on the modern male loneliness epidemic.

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Woman Googles Man For 45 Minutes, Achieves Forensic Science Certification

CAMBRIDGE, MA — Celebrating Women's History Month by honoring generations of female intellectual achievement, local woman Mary Kelly reportedly completed the academic equivalent of a graduate degree in Forensic Science Thursday night after spending 45 minutes Googling a man she matched with on a dating app.

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