Time Traveler Sends Himself a Phishing Email

Cybersecurity Experts Confirm Paradox Was ‘Technically Inevitable’
By Temporal Security Correspondent Clara Ridgeway
October 31, 2025 — Cambridge, MA

In what experts are calling the “most confusing cyber-incident in human history,” a time traveler reportedly fell victim to a phishing scam — from himself.

The traveler, who identified only as “Future Me”, admitted he “just wanted to remind Past Me to update his antivirus before the singularity.” Unfortunately, the reminder email contained a suspicious link labeled “Click Here to Save the Timeline.”

“I panicked,” said Present Me, now in full recovery mode. “You’d click it too if you thought the multiverse depended on it.”

Cybersecurity researchers are divided over how to classify the incident. “It’s either the first case of chronophishing or the last,” said Dr. Elena Hu from MIT’s Department of Temporal Information Security. “Technically, if you phish yourself from the future, you’re both the attacker and the victim, which cancels out — like dividing by zero.”

The event has caused minor disruptions across the spacetime continuum. Several bank accounts from 2047 briefly appeared in 2025 before vanishing again, and the Federal Reserve reported receiving an email from Tomorrow.

Meanwhile, the traveler insists it’s all part of a bigger plan: “I’ve been trying to warn myself for years. Next time I’ll just text.”

Authorities advise citizens not to respond to any emails from Future You unless digitally signed and quantum-timestamped.