Time Betrayed Us All

By The Daily Hyperbole Staff | November 3, 2025

In an act of cosmic treachery, Time itself conspired against humanity last night. One moment, it was 1:59 AM; the next, reality folded in on itself, and sixty precious minutes vanished into the void. Millions awoke disoriented, bleary-eyed, and existentially unmoored.

Coffee machines across the globe sputtered in grief. Office clocks hung in silent rebellion. Smartphones, smug with their automatic updates, mocked their analog cousins still clinging to the past — literally.

The result? Chaos. Schedules toppled like dominoes, alarms went off in forgotten time zones, and employees everywhere performed synchronized yawns of betrayal.

Somewhere, in the faint hum of history, Benjamin Franklin — the alleged inventor of this “energy-saving” travesty — whispered, “I told you so.” His laughter echoed through the centuries, equal parts triumph and malice.

Humanity, stripped of an hour and its dignity, marched onward anyway — clutching paper cups of overpriced caffeine and pretending nothing had happened. But deep down, everyone knew: time is no longer to be trusted.

“We gave it everything,” said one local commuter. “Our sleep, our sanity, and now... our souls.”

The great wheel of time continues to turn — but this morning, it creaks. The world may recover its hour someday. Its dignity? That’s another story.