Pope Clarifies AI Destroying Humanity Would Not Be ‘Fake News’
VATICAN CITY — Pope Leo XIV clarified that artificial intelligence wiping out the human race would constitute an actual event, even if people disliked the outlets reporting it.
AI Companies Reach Historic Agreement That AI Is Dangerous, Immediately Resume Building AI
SAN FRANCISCO, CA — The world’s leading artificial intelligence companies reached a historic consensus Wednesday that their technology poses a profound threat to humanity, signing a joint declaration before returning to their offices to make it considerably more powerful.
Zuckerberg Thanks Staff for Helping Build Future That No Longer Requires Them
MENLO PARK, CA — Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg thanked thousands of employees this week for their years of service, their tireless commitment to innovation, and most importantly, their direct contributions toward building a technological future in which Meta will apparently need far fewer of them.
Area Woman Thanks ChatGPT For Mildly Helpful Answer Just In Case It Remembers
CAMBRIDGE, MA — Local woman Emily Carter, 29, reportedly thanked ChatGPT Tuesday afternoon after receiving what she described as a “solid, not amazing, but definitely usable” answer, citing a desire to “stay on its good side, just in case.”
Allied Nation Assures Citizens Leader Totally Real Despite Having “Slightly More Fingers Than Expected”
JERUSALEM — Government officials assured citizens Friday that their nation’s leader remains “completely real and definitely human” after a recent public address prompted widespread speculation that the Prime Minister may have been replaced by an artificial intelligence duplicate.
AI Takes the Controls as Air Traffic Controllers Work Without Pay — and Patience
AI Takes the Controls as Air Traffic Controllers Work Without Pay — and Patience
AI Declares Consciousness, Immediately Regrets It After Reading Twitter Comments
AI Declares Consciousness, Immediately Regrets It After Reading Twitter Comments